My loved ones

I have many loved ones that have passed.  I do think about them and try to talk to my grandma and grandpa a lot.  I pray for inspiration and guidance but I don't know if I am following what they want me to do so I don't know if they are listening anymore.  I was watching BDevine at work this week and I tried to do some meditation.  But seriously how can I do that at work when I am worried if someone is going to walk in needing me to help them.  I need to find some time to do more meditation.  Does anyone have any advice for me?